Friday, June 16, 2017

This weeks winner is Richard Swainston.
Who the fuck is that ye might think, as did I when I first saw this workshy benefit scrounging  and wannabe benefit cheat begging for money to go to play darts in Northern Ireland.
This idiot even used the internet to claim he was looking for cash in hand work to defraud the system,
To get the full picture of this patheticness you should read this thread on The Darts Forum HERE a hilarious read.
As usual I encourage people to send me their reports and pieces and this is one I got from a member on said forum

My punt for this weeks claim to fame was the Taunton tortoise Justin Shite who has been rattling on how he should have had a premier league call up between 2011-2013.
Is this cunt for real or what?, I blame the piss taking paramedics who put the spastic back together in 93 after the car crash that left him needing a double eye transplant from Marty Feldman and other limbs the medical staff cobbled together from recently deceased victims of motor neurone disease.
What type of heinous sadomasochist would gain any type of gratification watching this thing play darts when his stance looks like a clothes horse that's been run over by a steamroller and you could read War And Peace from cover to cover between his visits to the dartboard.
Anyway enough about this buckled streak of paralysed piss and onto this week's winner who has came from nowhere and will shortly be returning to nowhere after his brief moment in the limelight, stand up and take a bow Richard "the gruffalo" Swainston.
This morbidly obese waddling heap of festering dog shit with blue fluff on it has been shaking his begging tin on a go fund me page that loudly you'd think Dave Clarke was playing a tambourine via a amplifier.
Believe it or not this fat cunt wants every penny he can syphon from joe public to advance his "career" in darts because unfortunately the child allowance he is supposed to receive for his kids barely keeps the bloated mongoloid in fags and fucking drink!.
Hopefully if this Shirley Crabtree body double robs enough fucking morons he's taking his massive 80 yes fuckin 80 average over to the PDC and he'll be looking to clean up there faster than the greedy shitpipe empties his dinner plate.
Utter fucking pond life that is nothing more than a walking advertisement for the reintroduction of Zyklon B

I would not mind but the cunt calls himself a PDC and BDO professional, yet here he is tapping for fag money, cash in hand jobs and mouthing off about using child tax credits.

Still he wont mind me and others slating him.
Oh No, as this guy does not care what we say and is a firm believer in the freedom of speech , which is something I guess.
for those who dont believe check out this tweet.
If of course he does get upset and proves he is a liar and thinks dishing out a few slaps will somehow miraculously change the truth, I am sure he can start a go fund me page to tap for the airfare to Cork,
Good luck with that.

As to other mentions this week, as mentioned above Justin Pipe.
I know the cunt is thick but how the fuck did he think he was going to get in to the PL,
Even if we put aside his lack of personality, charm, charisma, his lack of ability, his boring style, what did he win to warrant a spot. ?
The retarded cunt with a face that looks like it has been punctured claimed he should have been in the PL in 2011, 2012 and 2013.
In those 3 years he won ZERO TV Majors
Zero secondary tv titles.
In 2011, he was 48th in the Order of Merit
In 2012 he was still outside the top 20 and had won a career total of 5 matches on tv and the retarded cunt thought he deserved a spot.
2013 he reached #10 in the order of merit thanks to floor events but his best record was one tv semi final, which he lost and that was in the Players championships finals, a second tier event.
So fuck off you useless deluded cunt, no one likes you, wants to see you let alone have you infect their thursday nights...asshole.

A mention for James Wade who was a disgrace last weekend with his 72 average and now reduced to joining that lazy cunt fatpot in the UK qualifiers for euro Events. I will be surprised if he qualifies .

Speaking of lazy cunts, that hypoglycemic 2 faced lying cunt Barney.
Remember last december he promised to do the full tour, play all events , get himself sorted ? ....just a week or so before the Premier League wildcards were awarded.
Now the cunt is seemingly not entering protour floor events til August .

And lastly, but by no means least the fat gay waiter and the hog he is married to.
Yes that scumbag cunt who threatened people with violence on forums , facebook and other social media platforms, the cunt who told cancer sufferer Tommy Thompson of the EDO that he hoped his cancer treatment would fail., the cunt who knowing broke the law and sold copyright material on shirts, and then used the bdo to advertise the illegal garments, who is head of the bdo disciplinary committee had the audacity to try bring Wayne Dobinson in front of a kangaroo court hearing for....wait for it....breaking bdo social media policy.

How the fuck is that cunt Des Selecta not charged with rule breaking ?
Then you have sue the Gash basically ordering the fat gay waiter to charge Wayne dobinson with something, as if to say find something and make it stick.
Except Wayne can simply tell them to fuck off, what can they do ?
Already rumblings of Wayne being taken to court, that should provide a load more future fun .
Lets face the comedy from these crosseyed halfwits is more entertaining than any event they put on..

Speaking of shitty darts event, The EDO are showing some more of their shit this weekend, but with this fine glorious weather not sure how many people will spend their afternoons indoors watching comedy darts, played in some piss soaked church hall  filmed on a phone with audio that barely works and when it does is out of sync.

The BDO/EDO/WDF....the comedy gift that keeps on giving.

Stay tuned for further updates later