Who else was gonna win it this week but the guy now in hiding as the players fume over the pittance prize money, while companies the bdo owe money too are demanding payment, any wonder the useless cunt is in hiding and was not spotted this week.
By now everyone is aware of the reduced prize money which is 23k for the winner.. The prize money is so fucking bad, the entire prizefund would not cover the last 96 players at Ally Pally. As the week went on the Prize money was dropping quicker than the averages.
Social media was ripping the living piss out of the BDO, and rightly so. Prostate hole Adams even threw a dig in this article
Yes, the same cunt who stuck the knife in Olly's back and fucked up things when he was in charge.
The BBC were chucking out articles as well, including THIS ONE
as well as Anastasia Slams BDO
Then stories of a dutch company trying to get money of the BDO they were owed came out. Seemingly the BDO owed the company £20k, and every Des ignored all replies and now legal proceedings have begun. See Here
Is this the fault of social media des?
Is this the fault of forums ?
Is this the fault of my blog ?
Or the PDC ?
Yet simple minded cunts who defend the useless liar, are whining saying how darts need the BDO.
As I said last week the BDO could fold, it wont change a thing for the game, people will still play in pubs, local comps will still exist, superleague and counties shit will carry on as usual. The national bodies will look the game. Fuck the BDO, I want to see those inadequate useless shower of shits gone. and the cunts banned from ever running an organisation ever again. I could go on and on about his lies, how useless he is, but would be pointless, everyone knows, and those defending him are either lying to themselves, or really that fucking stupid. Its next week and beyond that is more important, and the backlash to this clusterfuck, the ongoing legal proceedings, the responses by the counties, and of course the exodus to Q-school.....but alas, the bdo players can line up pay their money, but the fact is everyone cannot get tourcards, so the bulk will have to go scurrying back to the shithole bdo with their tails between their legs.
THE JANUARY JOBBER JAMBOREE - THE ANNUAL LIVE COMEDY FESTIVAL
Due to the sheer volume of fuck ups during this clusterfuck of an event I will only mention some of the blatant lies, funny moments, graphic errors, etc rather than concentrate on each individual game, which were horrendous to watch the first time, so revisiting them games in detail again, does nobody any favors.
The comp started with a meager crowd shoved to the front of a dark room to give the illusion that they managed to have a crowd over 43 people.
The balcony was closed off, as expected with the light completely off. We were then told to welcome 2 legends of the BDO to comms, who were Tony O Shea and Paul Nicholson. Yes O Shea who is a joke who has won nothing of note, and how in the blue fuck is the human pipe cleaner Nicholson a bdo legend ?
Then footage is shown of the dark room, and then footage outside the arena with people walking around in the night....except its only 5 past fucking one in the afternoon. Bottler O Shea utters the phrase "new era" and gets Vicky Pruim's home town wrong. After this start I knew we were not going to be let down as usual. The Belgian senile pensioner Jackie got more time on tv in the first session than some players get for the entire competition. The general consensus among people was Dave Clark must have been the camera man due to the amount of shaking.
As for the spotting, the camera missed so many doubles, then so did the players. They was not even 20 minutes in to the comedy before twitter was ripping the piss out of this fiasco, and rightly so. A 69 average won a game in the munters match...yes 69. A bald Belgian who looked like someone I saw in the cancer ward the night before was among those old men the bdo are now full off....this is their conveyor belt of talent.
Checkout the future of the BDO if it survives
Where is the youth in the BDO ?
Almost all fail, and if there is a one with talent, ask yourself how long will he hang around for. playing for pittance in front of a crowd that would fit in a taxi. Any player with a brain regardless of whether they have talent or bot would be gone.
By the time the first session ended, not a single one of the 8 averages could break the 90 barrier, 2 of them were below 79, and one average in the 60s. It was an atrocious standard, for a competition that has the cheek to call itself a World "Pro" At one stage we had Justin Thompson, another old man on the wrong side of the age of 50 who made Scott Mitchell look like Usain Bolt taking forever to throw his darts, while the "Stockport wonderkid" Tony O Shea was calling this big time darts.....Thompson was averaging 77 at the time. Meanwhile that old fossil cunt John Gwynne started his usual routine of mentioning everything he knew of the world prior to 1983. We got stories of miners in the north, his schooldays, log end dartboards, old money currency, how much the pint cost in the 50s and other shit that no one gave a flying fuck about.
Chris Landman missed the board at one point when aiming for a single twenty. At another point O Shea muttered "nowhere near that treble 20- just shows how nervous he is"...no Tony you asshole, he missed cos he is shit. Landman then with 65 for the match miscounted and the stupid cunt was almost celebrating when he was informed of his mistake and he then lost the leg.
The only reason I was glad he eventually did win was because he beat that begging cunt Parletti, always good to see that cunt go out early. There was no fucking way I was sitting through the evening session after witnessing that abysmal afternoon session, so off for a few pints and found out I missed John Gwynne going on about maypole dancing, music in the 70s, and Yorkshire boxers, and also missed the annual first round defeat of Warty Montgomery who lost to a french jobber who won with an 86 average. Within minutes of his defeat the camera showed the poisonous little cunt horsing pints before Warty who should be used to losing first round then took to twitter crying because someone hurt his feeling. The vile and repulsive thing Bo Selecta then decided to reply and started abusing people. This is the same 2 faced ugly cow who cries about social media being negative, She is obviously too fucking stupid and ignorant to get the hypocrisy.
As was the case in the other session, the graphics were constantly fucked up, the scoreboard kept showing the wrong scores, audio coming and going, but the excuses kept coming from the thick mushrooms cunts who tried to claim all the production errors were the fault of it being played at a new venue. As if venue and production were the same thing. Then this level of brutal production was evident at Bob Potters run down hotel for years, but why let things like facts get in the way of the truth. The Jobber Gary Stone had his glasses knocked off by the mentally disturbed Belgian pensioner Jackie, and the camera the camera also caught a sign on tv that said "stick your PDC up your arse". Classy. We were told how the kid Beau Greaves is an amazing talent, she is 15, the future of darts and other such shit, and then announced she was going to q- school. Of course she is, only a fucking moron would stay in the bdo, anyone with any aspirations, backbone, talent, or desire would be out the fucking gap as soon as possible. By the time the first full day of this horseshit ended, there had been 16 averages, and only one managed to break the magical 90 barrier, and that was Warty and he was out.
By the time the Sunday afternoon session started I simply gave up....there was no way I was doing a review of each session, no matter how much of a masochist I thought I was, there are limits to how much a person can take of this shit. In fact, most of the BDO fans had given up on the darts by this stage and were now focusing their attention on twitter and facebook complaining about those who had complained about the BDO. You could not make this up. I laughed like a cunt when I found out the vile Bo Selecta and her cronies were spending their time discussing me rather than watch their own players on tv.
Bo Selecta obviously has an issue with someone on forums and says it goes over her head, if that were through why is she responding to something that does not bother her. How thick is she ?
Look at this shit by 2 lobotomy recipients. There are 6 year old kids in this country with better levels of education, and grasp on the English language. The funniest part is where the idiot says she talked her husband out of going to the PDC....as if the guy had a chance in the first place of getting a card. These people...
Of course I knew it would not be long before I was blamed for the failings of the BDO, after all everyone else is getting blamed, hardly surprising I would get left out. The best part of this is the sad sack of shit Neil Duff who constantly cries over me, but reads this blog every week, responds to my posts, and stalks me on twitter. Pretty odd behavior for someone who claims to dislike my blog. In fact the simpleton cunt does so much crying about me, he actually draws attention to my blog and makes it even more popular, but I guess that is lost on him. So thanks Neil, your whining like a bitch only generates more viewers for me. Keep up the good work even if it was unintentional for you.
Check out this thick bitch , who describes the bdo problems as "afew hick ups".
The dumb cow has a go at my spelling mistakes, but completely has no problem when the BDO put out posters and flyers with multiple spelling errors and then call themselves "professional"...on the rare times they actually spell that correctly.This Emma is yet another stupid bitch who no doubt will never get it.
Anyhow, back to the pub standard darts and the comedy gold moments of this comp, on the Sunday the useless Chaney going for treble 19 missed the board. The dyke Aileen de Graff was called one of the best players to ever come out of Holland....let that sink in for a bit. We were told over and over how the bdo fan is a quiet fan and the best for giving order. Of course this has always been utter bullshit, and this year was no different as the few fans in the large hall could clearly be heard swearing and shouting out. Due to the sheer pathetic size of the crowd, all their bad behavior was amplified due to the acoustics of an almost empty hall. We got the compulsory quote of how "the women are as good as the men". More a case of the men being as atrocious as the munters. Bottler O Shea told us how Deta and Thunder Thighs Turner were hammering the treble 20 in the practice room. Amazing how they always say this and then always chuck utter shit on tv. At this point people in the crowd were falling asleep
The atrocious munter shit finished with both useless cunts averaging in the low 60s. Des the liar is still probably wondering why Fallon Sheerluck said fuck off to the bdo this year. Her playing in this munters shit would undo and destroy all the good publicity she has garnered for herself. Why would she damage her "brand" by aligning herself with this backward shit ? On forums the Deta -v- Turner match was called one of the worst games ever to be on tv, little did they know what was coming later in the week that was going to be even worse. By the time Gino Vos turned up on stage to be batter by Kleermaker, the place was almost completely empty.
Then there was this howler.
Seemingly The Dutch player played Lakeshite when he was just 4 years old, and the Dutch player is from Luxembourg.
by the time the session was over and that was 4 complete sessions, there was still not a 95 average in the entire competition, let alone a ton average.
In fact of the 32 averages, 29 of them were in the 80s, 70s and 60s. Abysmal stuff.
Monday started with the 28 fans shoved up the front to fail miserably to make the place look "full". The spotting was all over the place, and during one game a fan in the front row got a text message and you could hear their phone beeping. During the Nick Fulwell match we were told by Paul Nicholson how Fulwell is "good with his fists". Beavis lookalike Wesley Harms was introduced as the World #1. Andy Hamilton won the first set of his match with a 69 average. The only player in the first 3 days to play any decent darts was the old stuttering cunt Paul hogan who was the only person to hit an average over 95 , which had the comms wetting themselves. Scott Waites beat Spineless Adams with an 84 average, hardly surprising seeing as Waites won 2 Bob Potter cups with similar averages. Waites has just one leg under 15 darts in the entire match. It was a deplorable day of darts, just like the Sunday and the Saturday.
Tuesday would have to be better, right ? Wrong. The lights on Tuesday were the lowest they were since the shitfest started, then it was the smallest crowd, and i use the term crowd in the loosest sense of the word. If you thought the Deta Hedman Laura Turner match was bad, then the Anastasia against Sharon Prins was just as bad, with averages of 64 and 62. I thought it would never end. In one leg Anastasia broke throw with a 32 dart leg...THIRTY FUCKING TWO. Tony Martin, Anastasia's husband, a former Lakeshite player was then called " a county player" by comms. On twitter a clubfooted brummie was saying fat nick Kenny was a contender for the title. Kenny reminds me of a slimmer Bellyboy without any talent whatsoever. Of course Kenny went out, he is shit. The evening session saw Gary Jobson leave the players bar for the first time since arriving at the venue. He went 2-0 up in sets and then lost the match, which led to some on twitter to accuse him of match fixing, not the first time this useless fucker has had that rumour circulate about games of his. Jobson finished with an average in the 70s....the game went 21 legs and not a single leg in the match was under 16 darts. This is a fucking joke calling this pub league shite a "world pro". If Robson was chucking a small few quid on rigged games, he would make more from the bookies than he would from the BDO. His bar tab must be astronomical.
Then we had up next the "Acropolis champion" Bo Selecta, who everyone predicted would lose. She is without a doubt the worst ever darts player I have ever fucking seen that has appeared on tv more than once. It finished with the munter averaging 63 and that was without a single shot at a double in the entire game. Make no mistake had the Tommy Cooper lookalike Lisa Ashton given Bo shots at a double it would have been in the 50s. A heap of people across forums made handy money on the game all betting on a 6 leg sweep and that Bo Selecta would not win a single leg.
Checkout the fuck up on graphics yet again
Then we had the "kid" Leighton Bennett who was brought crashing down to Earth after all his hype as the plodding fat farmer dumped the obnoxious kid with a bad attitude out of the comp. The highest average of that nights session was 84. We had throughout the night have Nicholson tell us about American sports, Wrestling, the Tyne river and the Royalty of Darts in attendance. Seemingly Fordham, Spineless and Mardle were darting royalty.
Wednesday saw the useless cunt Des the liar take to social media...yes that social media he claims to never use, to claim the Bo Selecta cannot take her practice game to the main stage. Decades it seems she has been unable to take her practice game to the stage, I reckon Des is lying and bo is shit in the practice room,....going out on a limb here. Check out the reply
As expected Wednesday was as poor as every other day, munters and pub players chucking shit at a board boring everyone senseless. Were it not for the fuck ups in the graphics, the production cock ups, and the constant mistakes from the female caller Kerrie Crompton or it would have been worse. Those were the best bits Crompton or whatever she is called makes Rab Butler seem like Einstein. She is atrocious and cannot count for shit. This is the girl who once cried that she should be cunt slack because she is amateur but in her profile calls herself a "professional referee". She did not call a single game in this event without at least one mistake or miscount. People were coming to her aid on social media saying how she was a lovely person....that might well be, but it wont change the fact she cannot count for shit and way out of her depth. Harms who actually believes he is the world number 1 in his warped reality, led 2-0 in sets against Waites who was averaging 88. Waites maintained his 88 average for the next 4 sets and won all 4 sets, such was the standard of the game. Unterbuchner showed why he was a choking cunt who threw away every set against the fat farmer. He won't be missed.
Thursday saw the comedy continue, in between the bad spotting, graphic errors, miscounts, ludicrous statements by comms, and of course the appalling darts. We had Corinne Hammond who waddled on stage with her huge arse and her eyebrows that looked like they were drawn on by the same person who did Steve West and Robbie Greens tattoo's. They looked like permanent marker. Her game with Thunder Thighs Turner was something else, the main talking point was the 43 dart leg...no...thats not a typo, a fucking 43 dart leg. Check out Turners first dart of the match where she missed the entire scoring area.....lol
Thunder Thighs Turner finished with a 61 average, the lowest average in the entire comp. This is the one that has the fucking audacity and nerve to plant her fat hole in the sky studio and give her expert opinion on PDC players and and act like she played at the top level. A useless commentator, and an even worse player, if she had a fucking ounce of pride, let alone shame or guilt she would realize how utterly ridiculous it is for her to be giving anyone advice on darts or giving her opinion which means nothing. Lorraine Winstanley fucked away her game to Lisa Ashton with countless missed doubles. P..P..Paul Ho..ho..Hogan and Kleermaker put on the game of the competition on the Thursday night, with the stuttering prick winning with a 99 average. He now had the 2 highest averages of the comp. As for Kleermaker, he said on dutch TV about Des the liar
'I haven't heard a word from the directors, only rumours. This because Jacklin is barely at the venue. He is scared to face the players. He doesn't have my support, and with me many more players. If the prizefund is truly that low, than it looks like this will be the end''.
Due to Hogan averaging 99 right away people were tipping the old cunt for the title, forgetting this is another guy that won fuck all in his career and choked against Durrant last year when he had match darts. It was only a matter of time before he choked.Backstage we saw the ever growing Beau Greaves stuffing her face full of cake, yes its her birthday, but judging by the size she is getting, a salad might be more appropriate. Meanwhile on facebook Bo Selecta was busy advertising the Torremolinos open for 2020. Nice to see where the Selecta's priorities are. Bottler O Shea then informed us the PDC contained only 25 professional players.
Saw fuckall all of the first 2 matches on the Friday, and watching a 57 year old roofer plodding to a long drawn out game or a munter win another boring match were not high on my list of things to do. Sadly I did see the Belgian cunt Mario against Evans, Woeful shit that seemed to last forever with pathetic averages as usual. The evening session started with one of the most over rated cunts in darts Jim Williams against the stuttering cunt Hogan. Hogan was an absolute disgrace who shat his load in the very first set and promptly lost the match with an 82 average. I knew his choke was coming. It was not like the useless cunt Williams was any better...yes the same Jim Williams who failed to get a PDC tourcard last year. He won 5-1 in sets with an 86 average. That tells you how pathetic the standard is.
After that we got Suzuki against Greaves, and I always enjoy seeing the hyped up British player getting fucked out by the foreigner. The racist scum of the BDO are well known for booing and shouting whilst the foreigners are throwing, that is if they even hang around for their games. so hopefully Suzuki goes on to win the comp. Last up was the battle of the self groping obese farmer and Mr Potato head the carpenter, comms told us how Waites is off to q-school... This game was a future "classic" in the minds of bdo morons, It went on forever, was watched by only a handful of people, low 90 averages, countless missed doubles etc....Nicholson spent the time during this telling us about figure skating, speedway, accents, Belgium and sipping tea. As George Carlin might say, Nicholson is the type of guy that needs to be penciled in for a visit from the grim reaper who can disembowel the fucker with a rusty fishing knife and leave him to die in the pale moonlight.The shit he has spouted is as bad if not worse than what Mardle spouts at Ally Pally.
Speaking of that uber-cunt Mardle, check him out acting like the autistic cunt we all know he is.
At one point in the game we got back to back maximums, but this being the BDO, I saw people on a forum asking if this actually happened. The best reply on the forum was they must has sat on the remote control and hit the rewind button, as that is usually the only way to see 2 maximums in a row.I laughed my bollix off at that.
This game went on an on and even after 20 odd legs we still had not a single ton plus checkout. By the time we reached the ninth set, we had one 100 plus checkout of over 30 legs, when the averages were low 90s. But this being the bdo, low 90s makes this game one of the best matches in a brutally shit comp. In the final set Nicholson told us that this is the type of games Waites usually wins. Guess what ? Waites lost.
Mitchell in his interview kept trying to kept his "playing for England" mentions in again, as if playing for England in bdo darts was something special.Mitchell spoke how he "roomed with Waites for England".....if playing for England was such a privilege and honour then you think the players would get their own fucking room the cheapskate bastards.
It was error after error with these cunts.....
So all that was left in this clusterfuck were 4 men, 2 munters, and 2 kids.
Is the first semi we have a 57 year old roofer, against a 50 year old farmer.
In the other a frail looking Belgian who looks like he is on chemo, against an even frailer looking over rated Welsh cunt who would take to his bed for a week with a hang nail.
In the Munters we had Ashton against Suzuki, and stand by what I said earlier, love the foreigners winning and upsetting the racist crowd.
Its hard enough to give a flying fuck about the mens game in the BDO, the munters game is only for comedic purposes, as for the youth final, the only thing i would like is for Keane Barry to win, not because he is a mick but because it would soften the cough on Bennett who needs a dose of reality.
now on to some stats.
At the time I am typing this there has been 50 matches and 100 averages.
of the 100 averages just four were over the 95 average....just four, and two of them by the same player. There was twice as many averages in the 60s....a total of 8.
In fact 76 of the 100 averages failed to break the 90 average, that is how shit this has been.
Some people thought there would be 100 plus averages, even with these boards with the huge trebles. What were they thinking.
